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Where does it hail because it never hails hear. I’ve heard it hails in Kansas. Kansas gets everything, hail and rain and sleet and hard snow and tornadoes and freaky munchkin people and God. Maybe they get so much crazy weather because the laws of science don’t strictly apply to Kansas, or so the legislature would have us believe.

I’m buying a car and I want to buy a hail damaged car for two reasons. The first reason is the incredible discount, I’m talking like 40% off the blue book value because nobody in their right civilized mind wants to drive arounda car that looks like its been through a war zone. Except me, which brings me to reason number two. If I had a hail damaged car, I could make up great stories, like I was involved in a high speed chase with a guy who had a potato gun. Or I used my car to escape from a volcano. Or I was attacked by a gaggle of zebras at a drive-through petting zoo, the safari type. Do zebras come in gaggles? I bet. Maybe a nypsyrustle. I know unicorns come in blessings. Does the anti-unicorn come in curses? If you saw eight unicorn-killing demons, would you be looking at a curse of demons? Hopefully I’ll never have to find out.

And now I’m going to smack you in the face with some random links. Here comes one, it’s how to deal with stress, though it’s really not. It’s just another blog like all the rest, though amusing enough. Here comes another one, I like to call it Vitamins Online but God knows what it’s really about.

I squeeze those stress balls, but I believe they actually cause stress as the more I squeeze, the more I wish I could pop them, making them explode. But that will never happen, thus my aggrevation. This is very similar to the pre-tooth brush each morning when I look down at the paste filled tube and I just want to squeeze it all out at once, but that would be a good waste of 97 cents.

I’m not sure I want to know how to deal with stress, because I believe a healthy amount of stress is what keeps me ticking, keeps me moving on a day-to-day basis. I have friends that bend every which way for yoga, and I know a guy who spends most of his spare time at the gym in front of mirrors, but these are not the type of people I want to become. I’d much rather be the frenetic person at the party who talks a bit too much, but still manages to draw a crowd with various antics just because otherwise the other party goers would be talking about their weightlifting and yoga routines, and really, who cares?!

I do one thing that I believe relieves a good amount of stress, and that’s the sex life. Sex has got to be one of the best forms of stress reliefs out there, too bad the task of achieving and maintaining a healthy sex life can be so stressful!